i was on a roll for about a week where i was writing on the "off" days and feeling very calm and confident about having something scheduled to post on the "on" days (monday, wednesdays, and fridays if you didn't know already).
yep, it's wednesday. and instead of writing my love letters i have been trying to strike the balance between:
1) action: getting my act together and pursuing ALL of the available options to help spiderman deal with his current distress
2) letting go: because none of the options are super obviously the "right" thing to do (or even if they are... there is much to be done to make them viable) and i can't fix this right now.
it's actually going okay... i've experienced some anxiety, but i've also experienced a butt load of joy (yes, a butt load) which is totally new for me (so woot!)... and i'm also having a fair of that thing people call "excitement." it feels just like anxiety, but it is accompanied with hopefulness. Craziness-people!
anyway, the point is that i got no love letters written... and i'm not sure i can write them on a spot. i'm a little anxious about this project, actually... i worry that i won't be able to adequately capture my gratitude, that i'll leave someone out, that i won't be able to use the same number of words for each person or same number of sentiments and people will wonder why they didn't get as much as someone else. eek! i worry a lot!
i'll get over all that and get to writing, but in the meantime here's my first love letter. it's to me... because i need it right now. :)
i love you.
ps, i still love you.