reading myself

Over the last two days I reread everything I've ever written in this blog... and you know what came up?
this is my "proof" of working smart.
emailing about schedules.  totally hot, i know.

(well, besides a whole lot of attempts to make excuses about why not to do it even though I said I was going to do it and need to hold myself accountable?)

In reading myself I was alarmed to see how quickly things moved over the last year.  Not really for my own sake, though... I tend to go fast and it works for me...  more out of fear of being found out.  As in: if anyone realizes how little experience I have doing any of these things I currently practice as my life they are going to know I'm a huge fraud and instantly <pick one: fire, dump, reject, shame, ignore> me.

Ay yay yay.

Even though it only took a year to get here, one of the benefits of the new me is that I know when my own head is spewing bullshit that needn't have my attention anymore.

Thank you, head.  Thank you, as always, for trying to protect me.  I've got this.